Why It Is OK To Be Vulnerable
Vulnerability can be seen as a weakness and something you shouldn’t share with others. We think that other people’s opinions of us will change if we show them our vulnerable side.
This is something I struggle with quite a bit. I always put on my happy face as I never want to show anyone the weak side of me. I want everyone to think I am happy all the time. I’m not alone in this. I think others also have a difficult time being vulnerable and opening up to people.
Why Don’t We Allow Ourselves to Be Vulnerable to Others?
1. We are Afraid People Will Judge Us & Reject Us
In our everyday lives, we are usually so calm, cool, and collected around others. No one can see our insecurities and the people in our day-to-day lives think we are invincible.
So, what happens when we show them that we are indeed human and not always living this perfect life? What happens when we show them our vulnerabilities, do they think less of us? Absolutely not! In fact, they respect us more for being honest.
By opening up to others, it allows others to open up to us and forms a deeper connection. People will not judge you and think you are weak. The opposite will happen and they will respect you for being so honest and real. This fear that people will judge us if we are vulnerable is not real.
We are afraid of showing our true feelings to someone that we might really care about because it leaves us open to rejection. Rejection can be a tough pill to swallow.
But by not being vulnerable and true to ourselves we are rejecting ourselves. We are saying “I don’t think I’m good enough for you, so I am not going to be open and honest with you.” In turn, rejecting ourselves by deciding to NOT be vulnerable so that someone else can’t reject us first.
Maybe we feel like rejection from ourselves is easier than rejection from another? We shouldn’t feel this way because we know ourselves better than anyone so getting rejected by someone else who doesn’t know us is actually better than us rejecting ourselves!
2. We are Afraid of Judging Ourselves
The fear of us thinking differently about ourselves is an even greater fear than someone else judging us. This is because people come and go in our lives, but we are going to be with ourselves forever, so we better not taint our opinion about how we see ourselves. We want to think we are invincible and can handle anything.
When we are vulnerable it leaves an opening for self-judgment. We might think things such as “why can’t I be a stronger person emotionally”, “why can’t I make a decision”, “why am I feeling so sad about this situation” and “what is wrong with me”.
But we have to recognize that just as we wouldn’t judge someone else for being vulnerable, we shouldn’t judge ourselves. We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t experience different emotions.
We have to own our own power and be OK with ourselves exactly as we are. Have you ever met a person who you found perfect in every way? Even their so-called “flaws” were cute and quirky and made you like them even more. Once you got to know this person, they told you how they didn’t like their nose, body, etc. This baffles you; how could they even think they are less than perfect?
You shouldn’t see yourself as any less than perfect either. Practice seeing yourself as you see the person you are infatuated with. Love your so-called “flaws” and see yourself as perfect in your own way. If you are having trouble with your personal power, check in with your solar plexus chakra and see if it needs some balancing and clearing work.
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Why It Is Ok to Be Vulnerable
If You Aren’t Vulnerable You May Never Know What Might Have Been
Let’s say two people like each other but they are both shy people, so they don’t ever say anything to each other. They both want to but neither one makes a move, hoping the other will. If no one ever gets a bit vulnerable and tells the other person how they feel, then they might never get together and have the most amazing relationship of their lives.
But if one person decides to be strong and tell the other person that they have feelings for them, therefore being completely vulnerable and open to rejection and the other person feels the same way, they can now start their amazing relationship together. Their bond will grow deeper over time as they are vulnerable to each other.
You Can Live Like a Robot or Live Like a Human Being
It’s not very satisfying to go through life never connecting with anyone and showing anyone your true feelings. You don’t want to go through life like a robot, only to get to the end of it and wish you told people how you felt and opened yourself up in different ways.
Being vulnerable means that you may get hurt, but also that you are really living your life in a way that is true to yourself. The reward you get from being vulnerable out-ways the risk of getting hurt. Why wouldn’t you want to take a chance to experience something that would never happen if you weren’t vulnerable?
~Meghan
