Are You Giving Away Your Power?

I recently watched a YouTube video about a guy who said that when he was in high school he went to school one day with his hair slicked back to try something new. Another kid in his class made fun of him because of this. He instantly came up with an excuse “I just rolled out of bed and didn’t have time to do my hair.” The thing is that he did his hair like that on purpose and when someone questioned it he didn’t own it. He backed down and therefore was giving away his power.

This got me thinking about circumstances in my life that I’ve done this. Have you ever been in that type of situation where you didn’t own your power? Are you giving away your power in situations in your life?

4 Ways You Might Be Giving Away Your Power

1. Do You Try to Please Everybody?

The fact is that you will NEVER be able to please everybody so why even try? There will always be someone who doesn’t agree or like what you are doing. That’s OK for them to have their own opinion. Just like it is OK for you to have your own opinion about what others are doing. That is what makes people unique and what keeps life interesting.

How boring would it be if everyone agreed with everything you said? It would be super boring.

It’s good to get others’ opinions but when it comes down to the decisions in your life you will never be able to please everybody. So, stick with the decisions you make and hope that others can accept them also. If you try to please everyone you will be giving away your power to them instead of keeping it for yourself.

2. Do You Justify Your Decisions?

Just like the above example do you try to justify your decisions when someone questions them? Or do you simply say “my hair is like this because I like it like this. I chose to do it like this today. If you don’t like it then that’s your problem.” By giving in and feeling the need to explain why you did something you are giving away your power. 

I’m sure you can think of an example where someone said something and you immediately jumped to the defense and tried to explain why instead of just owning it. An example for me is when I was dating someone new and he plugged in my I-phone to listen to the music and a song came on that I didn’t think he’d like so I immediately said “I don’t even remember putting this on my I-phone.” I actually didn’t remember but why did I feel the need to explain that in a defensive way? I should have owned it. I should have said, “I don’t remember downloading this song but it’s actually pretty awesome and I’m glad I bought it!”

These are pretty minor examples but all of these things make up your character and how you respond to others. You might have some other bigger examples of how you tried to justify your decisions instead of owning them. You don’t have to explain anything to anyone if you don’t want to. If someone asks you why you have chosen to do something and you don’t want to explain, just say “I am doing this because it is what I want to do.” You don’t need to give any more of an explanation than that. It’s your life, you don’t owe explanations to anyone.

3. Do You Feel the Need to Explain Everything?

Have you ever called in sick when you were actually sick and felt the need to explain every detail to your boss instead of just saying “I’m sick and can’t come in.”

I used to be that person.  I felt if I didn’t explain every detail then they wouldn’t believe me. Who cares if your boss believes you anyways, you have sick days and are allowed to use them! Or you might not be on salary and therefore not get paid for your sick days anyways so it’s only hurting yourself. Don’t feel like an explanation is needed, it is not. Most people don’t want to hear about your vomit anyways!

I worked in an office where people would call in to book an appointment with a physiotherapist and they would explain every detail to me over the phone. You really don’t need to do that. I just book the appointments; I can’t help you anyway. Discuss that with the professionals. I guess they thought maybe I’d be able to give them some advice over the phone, but that was not the case. You don’t need to explain everything to everyone, they usually don’t care anyway. 

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4. Do You Tell People Your Decisions Before it is Time?

This one can really hurt you if you aren’t careful. I used to tell everyone my ideas when they were in the early stages before they manifested and it is not a good idea! Only tell a couple of people close to you in the beginning and that’s it. There are a couple of reasons for this.

• The first is that they can steal your ideas! I really hope that none of your friends steal your ideas but it can happen. Be really careful to not tell the wrong people about your new business endeavor or whatever your idea is because people can be very selfish and steal your ideas.
• The second reason is if someone reacts in a non-positive way it affects how you feel and go about your new project. If someone has a negative reaction to your new business idea, then it might affect your positivity about it and by the great Law of Attraction, it can affect the outcome.
• The third reason is that it can get to the wrong people. If you tell your co-worker you are going to quit eventually and start your own business and she accidentally tells another co-worker who tells your boss, then your boss might just decide to get rid of you sooner than you might be ready for. So it is a good idea to keep that information private until you are ready to actually leave and pursue it.

Be Conscious That You Are Not Giving Away Your Power

Before you act make sure that you aren’t giving away your power. It is beneficial to keep great ideas to yourself in the beginning.

Also, try not to feel the need to justify every decision you make. If you want to wear purple pants and someone makes fun of you then don’t back down and say “that is the only clean pair of pants I have today.” Own your decision and let them know that you love your purple pants and that is why you are wearing them!

~Meghan